I have been struggling with this situation for some time and I thought it might help if I gained some perspective.I have been dealing with a very painful, chronic medical condition that has dominated my life for the past five years.
To say that this illness has changed my life would be an understatement.
It has virtually transformed my outlook on life to be more positive and open to change.
Despite these personal epiphanies, I find I have a blind spot in regards to the dating world.
During the first two years of my illness I dated a close friend.
It got fairly serious but we weren't meant to be (and it didn't end well).
Aside from our other issues, I knew then that my illness put a lot of pressure on the relationship and it was very difficult for my partner to deal with it.This knowledge has become a roadblock during my various dating attempts since my last relationship.When I meet someone I am interested in, I feel very guilty and overwhelmed by the idea that my illness is too much of a burden to ask this nice, unsuspecting guy to take on.I also begin to worry about how and when to disclose this personal information.It is difficult for the subject to come up organically in conversation, aside from asking "Have you heard any interesting medical stories lately?Well, I have this thing..." Usually, I become so stressed I immediately stop any attempt to pursue a relationship with said guy.