– the so-called “alpha males” who are tall, dark and handsome assholes with lantern jaws, fast cars, a six-pack and seven figure salary.
All other men are just shit out of luck and may as well jump off a cliff; they’re evolutionary dead-ends, forever doomed to be unable to spread their seed and carry on their genetic lineage.
Still others have equally arcane ideas of what women – apparently a monolithic entity of vast and unimaginable social power – want.
The common denominator in all these ideas boils down to “something other than me”.
The rest of it tends to be a mishmash of theories on what women want (or want, rather than what they say they do..) that explains why someone who isn’t them is getting all the sexing.
I can relate; God knows I spent enough time in my youth believing that there were two types of dudes in the world: the ones who women found attractive and everybody else. Of course, this begs the question of “if only a certain percentage of men get the majority of the women, why haven’t we died out as a species? The question is: “How do you know that this is what women find attractive?
” The answer is usually a variation of “this is what the media tells me” or “this is what I see all around me every day.” The problem with this is that, frankly, the plural of “anecdote” isn’t “data”.
People are prone to blind spots when it comes to a deeply held beliefs, an intellectual fallacy known as “confirmation bias”; that is, we’re only seeing the things that back up what we already believe and dismissing (or simply not seeing) everything else.So rather than going on about Studly Good-Night at the club with his Maserati and ,000 suit is the only one women like, I wanted to get down to what women Over on the Dr.Nerd Love Facebook page and Twitter feed, I put out the call for women to weigh in on what they found attractive in men – not just in looks but in personality, behavior and lifestyle.Now while I’ll be the first to say that this was not by stretch of the imagination a scientific study or formal poll, the results are, I think, fairly indicative of what women – predominantly 18-34 and cutting across many ethnic and religious demographics – like.Now obviously there was a fairly wide variety in what people liked; after all, aside from some baseline factors built in that encourage survival of the species – facial symmetry, outward signs of physical health and ability to sire/bear offspring – what we find attractive tends to change based on cultural and emotional influences.But there certain areas – call them attraction switches – that came up over and over again.