The question “what are you looking for in a relationship partner? Common attributes that come to mind include intelligence, kindness, sense of humor, attractiveness, or reliability.No matter what we think we’re looking for in a partner, the people we wind up choosing don’t necessarily match our criteria for an ideal companion.
We are inclined to replay events and dynamics that hurt us in the past in our adult relationships. Did they make you feel a way you felt in your past?
We choose partners who fit in with destructive patterns, not because we enjoy them, but because they’re familiar. Did the situation mirror a dynamic from your childhood?
When choosing a life partner, it’s important to break free from harmful tendencies from our past. While we can’t know for certain all the good and bad characteristics our partner will bring to the table when we first meet them, there are certain universal traits you might want to look for in a relationship partner that will ensure a happier outcome.
Consider the people you’ve previously chosen to be with and think about why it didn’t work out. No person is perfect, of course, but here are eight key qualities to look for in a partner: 1.
Emotional Maturity Every person comes equipped with flaws and emotional baggage. Instead, what you should look for in a partner is emotional maturity.
This means someone who is willing to think and learn about themselves, who is open to reflecting on the past and evolving in the present.
This certain someone should be non-reactive, in the sense that they think before they act.
They don’t let their instant emotions rule their actions.
They are independent and self-assured, which means they aren’t looking to you to fix or complete them. Openness Along with emotional maturity, one of the things to look for in a partner is an openness to feedback.